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Monday, October 11, 2010

Just Give Me Jesus.

It's true.
As time marches on, it really does seem to march faster.
At lightning speed, even. Or so it seems (sigh).
And me, being a very, very nostalgic person, I sometimes struggle with the ever increasing passage of days.

Sometimes, I just want to be able to put up my hand and command time to stop.
"Just stop, already, would you?
Stop.
My babies are growing stronger and taller and wiser and older with each passing day. I want you to stop, Time.
Pleeease."

But of course, time doesn't listen. I don't have authority over it the way Jesus did over the waves when He commanded them to stop (and they did).
Like it or not,I must accept that time marches on.
Now, it's easy to accept that fact (with great relief) on the bad days, the days that you just wish would end and are glad when they do.
But on other days, when I'm looking into the beautiful face of one of my children, for example, and I have a sudden rush of love and wanting to hold them close forever, it,...well, it kind of hurts.
(Anyone?)

Where would I be without my faith?

It has carried me through soooo much since I first placed my trust in Jesus.

  • Infertility.

  • My husband's job elimination back home and the resulting 14 month separation our family had to endure (he worked in Chicago and commuted home to Cleveland during that time).

  • A somewhat involuntary move to a new state.

  • Health scares.

  • Foster care, adoption, and adoption loss.

  • Career changes.

  • The death of my mother-in-law.

  • So. Much. More.



Really, where in the world would I be without Him?

There is sweetness in knowing my God has it all worked out. That He is the author of all time, who created me and the Godly husband and precious children He has so richly blessed me with. That He knows my tender heart on this "issue" of mine, of being a nostalgic person who is sensative to the passage of time. That He assures me through His word of His love for me, of the plans He has for me, that I can in fact be still and know that He is God. He is able to order and purpose my days and the hours that lie within them.

As I type this now, I can hear the tick-tick-tick of the wall clock in the school room behind me. I might never conquer my bittersweet dance with time, both its moving forward and my nostalgic reflecting back, but I'm so grateful to have my strong tower, my comfort, my place of rest. My Savior.

I was able to hear Anne Graham Lotz speak when she was in Cleveland back in 2001 or so. And I think she says it well when she exlaims, "Just give me Jesus." If you've never seen the video below, never heard Anne saying those four words that align so perfectly with my heart's desire, "Just give me Jesus", then please, take just a moment now to allow her words to encourage you today. Be blessed!



Live wise in Him!

~Toni~

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